The Sentimentalist

By Julie Enfield on March 6, 2010 4:49 PM

There's a gold rush underway. Medals. Beer.

Most of us have watched Sean Connery reveal his famous penchant for "shaken, not stirred" martinis in the James Bond flick, Goldfinger, yet ever since Canada's Women's Hockey celebrated their Olympic victory with a beer party on ice, cocktail culture has been going through some equally intense moments.

Hence, when it comes to dressing for the apres-Game happy hour, the Hudson's Bay Co. has been creating more than a stir in the mix. Indeed, Canada's own design dynamo, Tu Ly, goes for gold with his resurrected hand-knit sweater featuring an elk and maple leaf. And he scores with the Canuck pedigree still intact.

But before you scream "Get thee to a brewery!" I urge you to scroll and read the ever-evolving history of golden cocktail moments.

It all began in 1926 when Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel shook-up the fashion world with her "little black dress." With its modernist austerity and streamlined silhouette, the versatile dress soon became a key ingredient of a woman's wardrobe, turning Coco and her LBD into cocktail icons.

But, alas, the depression managed to dampen the era's spirit. As cocktail parties drifted from the public realm and became private affairs, day-into-evening dresses were introduced by American designers. This new cocktail trend was quickly picked up and made popular by Hollywood screen stars like Greta Garbo and Mae West.

The cocktail hour during the '40s witnessed an influx of body-revealing styles as hemlines shot up and necklines inched down. Art Deco was at its height and women, it seemed, could barely get their fill of sequins and rhinestones. Christian Dior was the first designer to give his lavish party frock a beverage label. Dior's "cocktail" dress remains ubiquitous, being the only apparel to be named after a drink.

By the early '50s, cocktail attire had saturated mainstream culture. Full skirts and plunging necklines were the order of the day. Three-piece suits and dress and coat ensembles in muted cocktail hues with dyed-to-match shoes and bag began to surface, and mixed drinks with names like "Shady Lady" and "Fallen Angel" quickly became a part of the mix. Music also played a major role in the cocktail hour. The Cha-cha-cha was always more elegant with a martini in a matching gloved hand.

The early '60s was the era of the classic cocktail dress, personified by Audrey Hepburn in the film Breakfast at Tiffany's. By the mid-'60s, other trends were entering the mix. Carnaby Street and Op Art fashions made a significant splash in the Western world. A surge of micro-mini skirts and dresses redefined fashion in the cocktail world. Psychedelic patterns gave cocktail dressing a spirited twist.

Cocktail attire continued to evolve dramatically during the '70s. Undertones of "active wear," which first appeared in the April 1977 issue of Vogue (featuring Farrah Fawcett wearing her favourite NIKE sneakers), began to trickle into the cocktail hour. (And who could forget the sight of Diane Keaton, as Annie Hall, sporting an oversized cardigan and toting a briefcase everywhere she went?)

By the end of the '70s, discos such as Studio 54 in New York City had become the new meccas of cocktail culture. Andy Warhol elevated cocktail attire by turning cocktail-sipping fashion mavens and models into veritable superstars.

The rise of punk bands like the Talking Heads and Blondie in the early '80s bubbled-up some of the most bizarre sartorial mixes - the little black dress combined with Doc Martens boots. Coupled with the fitness craze, our simple little black dress suddenly looked ready for a sports bar.

Which sends me speeding back to our Olympian beer bash and style star Tu Ly's signature sweater. Like boutique beer, the trendy knit shows no sign of slowing down. Oh... did I mention it retails for $300?

Victory is never cheap.

Rock On, Hubertus

By Julie Enfield on February 27, 2010 9:17 PM

So stands the statue that enchants the world-

The mingled beauties of exulting Greece.

-James Thomson (1700-1748)

He is the brawny warrior with serpentine curls, almond-shaped eyes, aquiline nose, and rounded, bee-stung lips. He is the Olympian god of light and divination. He is the Apollo Belvedere - and for a thousand years people journeyed to the oracle of Delphi, housed in his temple, to admire his beauty. (The marble Apollo that now resides in the Vatican is a Roman copy of a Greek bronze original that was created between 350-325 B.C.) He was discovered in 1503 on the old road to Mariano (near to Rome) and was first placed in the garden of a Cardinal. Naked except for the cloak draped over one arm, Apollo's elegant bearing quickly catapulted him to life at the courts. The statue became so famous that he was taken on several grand tours of Europe and, five hundred years later he made his debut at the MOMA in New York City. In true "rock star" fashion.

Greek statues, like the Apollo Belevede, tell the square-inch-by-square-inch history of how stone has become surrogate for flesh. The very apogee of Olympic visions, statues of ideal bodies transport us.

When it came to the Olympian Games, first held in 776 B.C., the ancient Greeks played hard and fast. It was the ancient Greeks who elevated masculine beauty to a new god-like standard by removing the contestant's clothes. Back then, there were no team sports, no torch marathons, no female athletes. Just well-chiselled, oil-glistening, buck-naked, male bodies. Victory was represented in the form of a winged female figure known as Nike, who had the cushy job of flying down and placing a laurel wreath (which would be the equivalent of today's gold medal) on the head of the god-chosen winner.

Fast forward to 2010 Winter Olympics, Vancouver.

Enter Prince Hubertus of Hohenlohe-Langenburg. The buff Olympic skier from Mexico is also a photographer, an entrepreneur, and a pop star known as Andy Himalay. Did I mention that he is polylingual? Five languages to be exact. (That's what happens when you have descended from the reigning dynasty of a former principality in what is now Germany.) And, that's not all....the rock-solid, 51-year-old Hubertus was the oldest athlete to compete at the Vancouver Winter Games.

Cut to 1504, Florence, Italy

It was all very tantalizing - The impact of the male statuary on the history of taste was nothing less than revolutionary. Carved from a huge block of pure white unflawed Carrara marble, the "Giant," as the four-meter statue was commonly called, is filled with heroism keeping with classical colossal statues - from the outstretched foot all the way up to the bedroom hair he is the largest and most widely admired sculpture of masculine nudity in the history of post-classical art. Michelangelo was the first artist since the ancient Greeks to restore proportionate genitals to the male figure. (Still, the citizens of Florence still mired in Medieval morality were so offended they stoned the nude Giant when he was first unveiled in public.)

My point? Gazing at glistening marble statues and watching Olympic athletes like Hubertus, we are in awe of the beauty and power of age.

Certainly nude statues and Olympic athletes are the embodiment of physical perfection, but they also exist in the realm of dreams and intellect. If we are to learn anything from them it is that we ourselves are mutable. In other words, we all rock!

Good Vibrations

By Julie Enfield on February 19, 2010 4:22 AM

"If music be the food of love, play on!" Shakespeare wrote in Twelfth Night, probably sensing that music could be an inspiration for romantic kisses.

Voice is a recent acquisition in terms of human evolution - a penetrating, symphonic wonder. Our voice reveals not only our skills as communicators but also our background, character traits and emotions. "Speech is a mirror of the soul," said Syrus in the first century B.C. But as every Zoomer knows: Voice can be intimate. Voice can be sex off the leash. And no one knows the seductive power of the voice and the tonal nuances better that those who are trying to impress a potential partner. Women routinely modulate their voices up an octave to embrace soft, purring tones, and men lower their voices an octave in order to create husky, seductive tones.

When we form our mouths into a "cupid's bow" we are playing a symphony of strings. How empty our kisses would be without the accompanying sounds of our lips, tongue, teeth, and saliva. From an onomatopoetic perspective, a kiss makes a lip-smacking noise. The very sound of the word "smack" captivates us. Indeed, it makes us smack our lips together just to say it!

According to The Perfumed Garden: "A kiss should be sonorous. Its sound - light and prolonged - takes its rise between the tongue and the moist edge of the palate. It is produced by a movement of the tongue in the mouth and a displacement of the saliva provoked by suction." Of course today's virtual world - without touch - was far beyond the early 16th-century poet Nefwazi's understanding. But the importance he placed on the role of sound in the erotic experience is far more-prescient than he could have possibly imagined.

We press our lips together and emulate a sweet smacking sound into the hard moulded plastic receiver. When we kiss over the phone, we translate touch into sound. The phone kiss jump-starts us back into our body. In the case of a dual phone kiss, two people kiss as symmetrical partners: ear to mouth, mouth to voice. The stimulation we feel, however, is a response to a concept rather then a tactile sensation. We imagine our phone kisses as they zoom through wires and air into our beloved's ear. In another sense, the phone itself "kisses" the ear of its listener. Digital signals become the wings of our desire.

Add to this some good vibrations - such as your favourite love songs and chances are your stress levels will significantly decrease. Music increases endorphin levels (the body's feel-good hormones). The right beat can induce a natural high. Euphonious sounds also affect our heartbeat, pulse rate, and blood pressure. According to anaesthesiologists, music can significantly decrease the level of stress hormones, the more relaxed and luxurious we feel. (Calm and heightened conscious produces alpha waves of nine to 14 cycles per second whereas stronger emotions produce 15 to 40 cycles per second.) Because the auditory nerve connects the inner ear with all the muscles in the body (vibro-accoustic memory), music improves body movement, thus reducing body tension. A slower and deeper respiration enables us to reach easier and deeper orgasms while making love. In addition, a flourish of musical notes can promote endurance (increasing performance time up to 25 percent).

Practising a little "lip dancing" - by varying kissing tempo - is the signature move of a principal smoocher. The intimate tango of lips and tongues stimulates the brain and transports is us into an oasis of harmonious delights.

Romance by Any Other Name

By Julie Enfield on February 6, 2010 1:07 PM

It was roses, roses, all the way.

-Robert Browning

The Greek poet Sappho called it "the Queen of Flowers". And whether presented as a single, long-stemmed bloom or an armful of luxurious blossoms, the Rose (from the Latin rosa), more than any other flower, has been the symbol of romantic love.

The rose has a long and plush history. Almost every civilization has tended and cherished this heroine of flowers. Roses have been found in Egyptian tombs. Garlands of roses can be seen tumbling down from frescoes painted during the golden age of the Minoan culture on Crete. It was with the intoxicating perfume of roses that Cleopatra had her sails drenched; fragrantly announcing her arrival at ports of call along the Nile. Prized for their opulent fragrance, the Crusaders, in 1254, carted Damask roses back to Europe (from Damascus - hence the name). And, there is nothing like the wild scent of Damasks to set the mood for romance.

Beds of roses

Greeks and Romans adored the rose and they recounted many romantic tales about this heartfelt flower. In one Greek myth, Cupid charged off to Mount Olympus carrying a vessel of nectar for the council of the gods to drink. Before reaching his destination, however, he stumbled, and the spilled nectar transformed into a valley of breathtaking roses. Cleopatra is noted for commissioning a plush carpet of rose petals (eighteen inches deep, to be exact) to help make the arrival of her Roman paramour Mark Anthony more rapturous. In addition, her couches were lushly strewn with rose petals. We can only imagine the romantic interludes that arose from this tantalizing sea of petals.

And the allure of roses didn't stop there. Apparently, the early Romans ate, drank, and gossiped while engulfed in roses. Anything said under a rose garland or chaplet (worn on the head) was sub rosa - A Latin expression meaning "under the rose," to be kept secret. The Roman Emperor Nero had thousands of rose petals scattered in his palace in lieu of carpets. For an added effect, showers of rose water jetted down from his picturesque ceilings (that had been rigged to open up and rain petals upon his guests) and the heady aroma of roses was blown into bed chambers though hidden silver tubes. Even a rose holiday was created - Rosalia - in early May, to celebrate the flower of passion.

Floral languages

After the fall of the Roman Empire, rose cultivation was continued by Benedictine monks, and the once fervent flower gradually became a chaste symbol. A rosary was made using 165 dried rose petals. Then, in the early seventeenth century, a lyrical language of flowers blossomed in Constantinople. This Persian floral poetry was introduced to Europe by Charles II, while a Turkish variaton was presented to England by a certain Lady Mary Wortley Montagu (1716). The floral language flourished and it soon spread to France where it was translated into a lovers' handbook of 800 flower passages known as Le Language des Fleurs. Lovers typically exchanged the fragrant verses along with a flower or bouquet. According to the manual, a red rose signified beauty, while red and white roses together meant unity. White roses cautioned innocence. Yellow roses revealed a jealous heart. Over time, the symbolism grew in intricacy with combinations. For example, a rose in full bloom draped over two buds implied a secret laision. By removing the thorns from a rosebud stalk you were saying: " I encourage this courtship." Upon deleafing a rose you signified, "There's no future to hope for." Should you desire to express love and fascination with a love interest today, a red rose is said to symbolize eternal love and passion; a pink rose devotion; a white rose innocence, and the yellow rose loyalty and friendship.

Cultivating love

In the nineteenth century, the rose as a symbol of romance was sealed when the French Empress Josephine (Napoleon's wife) cultivated an extensive collection of roses at her estate in Marseilles. Renowned for its exquisite blooms, the garden became the stage for illustrator Pierre Joseph Redoute's botanical designs. And, in 1824, one of the finest records of botanical illustrations was rendered in his water color entitled Les Rose. Around this same time Victorian suitors were busy revealing their passions via gifts of roses - different hues, varieties, and arrangements were used to express numerous love messages.

Small wonder this heroine of flowers has thrived as the traditional flower of St. Valentine's Day. (It is estimated that over 200 million roses are exchanged worldwide on this one day alone.) And, even after its colorful, heart-throbbing history, the red rose reigns as the quintessential flower of love.

Everything Begins with a Kiss

By Julie Enfield on January 29, 2010 8:52 PM

How delicious is the winning

Of a kiss at Love's beginning.

-Thomas Campbell (1777-1844)

Whether is signifies love at first sight, forbidden love, unrequited love, obsessive love, first love, spiritual love, or tragic love, kissing is the culmination of passion. And what made kisses so sensational in the old days was that consummation was usually left to linger in the kiss-recipient's mind.

Ah... kissing. Throughout our lives, we are kissed by fortune, by love. We learn to shape our most passionate desires with our lips.

We are born in our parents first kiss and our earliest memories are of our mother's fond kisses. Of the kisses that follow, none seems more intense than our first romantic kiss. Innocent, sexy, light, passionate a first kiss can cause participants to soar to new romantic heights. It is through our first romantic kiss that a taste of "heaven" comes to us.

Like anyone else, my first knowledge of kissing was born of experience. (It was my lifelong interest in human behaviour, art and history that propelled me to write a book about this most powerful and evocative gesture.)

On my kiss journey, I was surprised to find that some cultures don't kiss at all - who find kissing on the lips distasteful. Still others kiss voraciously, sucking and biting each other's lips until they bleed. And kissing is not exclusive to humans. Bonobo apes (the only primates apart from humans to copulate face to face) also kiss, probing deeply with their tongues.

I learned that when when lovers' lips meet for the first time, they kiss with all their senses, absorbing each others' unique taste and fragrance. Indeed, each kiss stirs our olfactory sites and carries the potential to activate powerful, pleasurable feelings. It's no wonder that when we kiss and the sparks begin to fly, we are said to have the right "chemistry." Great kissing produces an adrenaline-like neurochemical explosion and the desire to kiss seems to be predicated on the desire to become one.

It's no secret: a premier kiss can set the stage for the rest of the relationship. Many women, including myself, will decide whether to have a relationship with a partner, based on his/her initial smooching skills. As in days of old, a mediocre kisser won't get past the doorstep. What exactly determines an exemplary kisser, you ask? The ideal kisser views the kiss as the ultimate destination, and not as the first move on a corporal mission. In other words, an accomplished kisser know how to savour every moment of the kiss and leave her partner thirsting for more.

And to help encourage ZOOMER readers to keep kissing during Canada's coldest month, there is Robert Herrick (1591-1674), one of the most celebrated masters of eternal "first" kisses:

Give me a kiss, and to that add a score;

then to that twenty, add a hundred more-

A thousand to that hundred - so kiss on,

To make that thousand up a million.

Treble that million, and when that is done,

Let's kiss afresh, as when we first begun.

Mirror, Mirror

By Julie Enfield on January 24, 2010 12:37 AM

The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without

speaking confess the secrets of the heart.

-St. Jerome

You're sitting in a cafe reading a newspaper and every time you turn a page you lock eyes with an attractive stranger sitting opposite you at the next table. You nervously scratch your nose, and BAM! microseconds later he scratches his nose in exactly the same spot. You bring your hand to your mouth, and PRESTO! - he does the same. What the deuce is going on here?

This curious behaviour is called "interactional synchrony" or "mirroring," and it is used - usually on a sub-conscious level - by anyone wanting to impress another via imitation. The philosophy behind mirroring is one of our basic survival instincts: we are inclined to trust those who are similar to ourselves and to mistrust those whom we perceive as being different - ancient reflections, perhaps, of a clan-mentality. In contemporary culture, if you use mirroring with someone you have just met, he will instinctively know that you can be trusted, and, hence, feel an attraction to you. It is the ultimate mating dance.

Mirroring is inviting because it indicates that your imitator wants you to take the lead. And, because you have the upper hand, it's entirely up to you where you take it from there.

When you move in perfect tempo with another - by mirroring their posture, gestures, and speech patterns - barriers come down, and you sense that the person appears to be on the same page as you. For instance, you're having dinner with a date and he's leaning forward talking intensely about art. Now, whether art is your favourite subject or not is unimportant at this point - you can invoke a spontaneous rapport if you emulate him by leaning forward and listening intently. Ditto the sane body language in a reverse gender or same-sex scenerio.

If you doubt the power of mirroring, consider the scientific fact that words account for a mere 30 percent of the message being communicated while voice tonality and body language together account for an impressive 70 percent of what is being conveyed. What's more, your energy level, your sense of ease, and your over-all self-esteem - all vital prerequisites to a romantic future - can be cloned by an attentive partner. Video-taped studies indicate that when two people are attracted to one another they will mimic each other's behaviour within eight seconds.

Our mouths alone yield some very telling signals which are subconsciously decoded by others. Every mirrored curvature of the lips, for example, gives us the confidence and encouragement to make our next statement in the form of a magnificent kiss.

If he begins to wander outside of the mirror and is gazing deeply into your eyes, it's quite probable that there are potential kisses gathering. (Darting eyes, or a fixed, unfocused stare usually indicates that the person's attention is elsewhere.) When both the eyes and chin face downward, it's just a sign of shyness. One of the most dynamic ways a man signals that he's interested in advancing beyond, say, cheek-kisses to the tongue-in-mouth variety, is when he begins to impulsively button and unbutton his jacket (or adjust the knot in his tie). The non-verbal jacket twitch can be translated: "I'm trying to be open here - help me." Mirror the same button maneuvers with your own jacket and you are essentially responding in kind. If your imitator rests his hands on his hips with his elbows projecting outward, subconsciously, he is trying to make himself appear larger. This is another subtle message that spells protection. Anyone who reaches out with her palm facing upward is signalling open-mindedness. Should the palm face down, however, she's letting you know that your advances will most likely be spurned.

The subliminal language of legs and feet may be stretching it, but they do play a significant role in mating and mirroring. When someone's legs and feet are steered away from you, it's a sure signal to keep a distance. But, as I quickly learned while doing my field research at Starbuck's , when person's toes are pointed in your direction, it means he wants to socialize - giving the cue to either side-step the issue or meet toe to toe.

S.W.A.K., Facebook Style

By Julie Enfield on January 16, 2010 2:40 PM

My message will go kissingly to thine,

With more than Fancy's load of luxury,

and prove a true love letter.

-J.G. Saxe (1816-1887)

It's no big wonder that epistolary romance has gone electronic. With the emergence of Facebook in 2004, the writing was literally on the cybernetic wall. But the question I've been asking myself lately is: can amatory correspondence survive in today's world of online social networking?

There is a riveting moment in Leo Tolstoy's nineteenth-century novel Anna Karenina, when Levin writes a proposal of marriage to Kitty while she watches him pen the words. What separates writing something down by hand and from using your computer mouse to, say... "poke" a love interest on Facebook, is that the former upholds a gesture of commitment - it is an intimate act of courage between two people - a way to pledge your innermost feelings to a beloved.

With hand-written letters, you're venturing into unknown territory because you don't know what the other person is thinking. In contrast, the love messages authored on social networks, such as Facebook, offer us a voyeuristic view of what most of our friends are thinking, and doing.

(Speaking of friends, there are currently over 350 million active Facebook users worldwide among whom the ideal user boasts about 300 pals - which seems - even for a die-hard sentalimentalist like me - a way-out-of-control number of friendships to cultivate.)

Call me old-fashioned, but I believe an ideal love letter should set the pulse racing for days, months, years after its inscription. Whether the contents be happy or sad, nostalgic or desperate with longing, it should transform us into our favoured deities of desire: Psyche and Cupid, Daphne and Apollo, Helen and Paris, Aphrodite and Adonis, Sito and Rama, Hero and Leander. When we linger over our paramour's ardently penned passages we should simultaneously feel like the heroines and heroes of own legends.

The Old Testament's Song of Songs remains (for me) one of the most romantic and sensual love exchanges ever recorded. Written sometime in the second half of the fifth century B.C., the text is a rhapsodic account of the physical passion between a couple in the flush of spring. The sacred correspondence begins with the woman's voice: "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth: for thy love is better than wine." Unlike today's communal high-speed acronyms, such as "OMG, r u in luv?," the verses of ancient romance demanded an intimate symmetry and embraced the notion of becoming one with the beloved.

Fast forwarding, one has to wonder if electronic social networks are big time-wasters - ports of plenty for hard-wired polyamorists and partner-poachers who are in dire need of attention. Or, are online social networks like Facebook truly becoming amatory oasises of self-expression? I will leave this one for you to ponder.

GBH&K (Great Big Hugs and Kisses), Julie

The Name Game

By Julie Enfield on January 10, 2010 5:53 AM

Apple apple bo Bapple!

Banana fanna fo Fapple!

Fe fi mo Mapple!

APPLE!

It used to be that most of us would go through life with the traditional name our parents gave us. For better or worse, a name is something your parents choose. Sure, we can all recall those difficult names such as Wilbur or Gertrude, but the general rule was, and still is, to stick to something common. Names like Jane and John just make life easier. And although Jacob and Emily (top names for the last decade) are enjoying a redux moment, some major name-shifting is definitely taking place.

What's in a name?

With the second baby boom in full swing, ZOOMERS can expect the names of their childrens' progeny to pack a brand-name punch, as many of today's parents are turning to corporate products for inspiration. Certainly, place names like Denver, Michigan, Montana, Paris, and even Rio, continue to be popular, but there seems to be a growing trend for parents to give otherwise run-of-the-mill names, a spin. The result? Many kids are being named after cosmetic companies (L' Oreal); design houses (Armani, Chanel, Timberland) camera makers (Canon, Nikon); and food brands (Del Monte). And that's not all. The Brandys of the world are joined by the bubbly Champagnes as well as the smooth Courvoisiers.

Hit the Road, Jensen!

I find it hard to believe, but according to a recent poll on the most popular baby names in Canada, car model names are on the road to personal pronoun-ship. And if you think the folk at Stats Can are just kidding around, rest assured - they know their Astons from their Bentleys. Evidently there is a surge of girls who are registered as having the name Infinity, while many boys respond to Royce. Other leading car names for boys include: Dodge, Ford, Lexus, and Packard. For girls, Mercedes, Nova, and Porshe are pulling ahead.

Sp-Elle Check

Not only are today's parents getting creative with names, they're also getting creative with their spelling. Should you bump into a Jackson, for example, there's a very good chance it's spelled Jaxson, Jacson, Jacksen or Jakson. When it comes to spelling of girls' names such as Skyden and Pyrce, the letter y is often substituted for e or i. The number of spellings seems to increase according to the popularity of the name. A-listers like Hailey, for instance, can have as many as six spellings: Hailey, Haley, Halie, Haylee, Hayleigh, Hayley. Ditto for Madison: Madison, Madisson, Madisyn, Madisynne, Madyson.

Name Dropping

It's been almost impossible to miss the rise of celebrity baby names over past decade. And while names like Maddox and Brooklyn remain popular choices, a number of never-been-heard names are cropping up at famous Moms' baby showers. A good example of this unique, new name calling is Apple Blythe Alson Martin, the daughter of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin (born on May 14th, 2004, in London). And the list, of course, goes on:

Rumer Glenn, Tallulah Belle and Scout LaRue (daughters of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis)
Diezel and Denim (sons of Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis)
Prince Michael, Prince Michael II (AKA Blanket), and Paris Michael
(children of Michael Jackson)
Speck Wildhorse and Hud (sons of John Mellencamp and Elaine Irwin)
Pilot Inspektor (son of Jason Lee and Beth Riesgraf)
Tu Morrow (daughter of Rob Morrow and Debbon Ayre)
Audio Science (son of Shannyn Sossamon and Dallas Clayton)
Moon Unit, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan, Dweezil, and Diva (children ofZappa)
Banjo (son of Rachel Griffiths)
Jaz (daughter of Andre Agassi and Steffi Graf)
Romeo and Brooklyn (sons of Victoria and David Beckham)
Aurelius (son of Elle Macpherson)
Lyric and Zephyr (daughter and son of Robby Benson)
Hopper (son of Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn)
Kyd (son of David Duchovny and Tea Leoni)
Reignbeau and Freedom (daughter and son of Ving Rhames)
Jermajesty (son of Jermaine Jackson)
Kal-el Coppola Cage (son of Nicolas Cage and Alice Kim

A Dog Named Lou

Remember when dogs used to have dog sounding names? Bull dogs were called Spike and dalmatians were called Spot. Others got no-frills names like Sparky and Buster. Then, right out of the blue, oodles of poodles and packs of svelte and sophisticated crossbreeds decided to buddy up with the jet-set, making the jump from suburban family-room couches to Hollywood red carpets (which secured them instant celebrity status). So, it was just a matter of time for before our canine companions would be given human names. And, here they are, the top dogs names today: Max, Bailey, Molly, Lucy, Maggie, Daisy, Chloe, Sophie and Tobias. Just don't mix these names with "Go Fetch!"

The Smiles of Champions

By Julie Enfield on January 4, 2010 3:38 AM

Smiling is my favourite sport. And when it comes to the "longest smile" award, Leonardo di Vinci's La Gioconda (Mona Lisa) most definitely takes the gold.

What's with Mona Lisa's smile anyway? For nearly five centuries, people have been mesmerized with the many nuances of this lady's lips. She could be having the worst hair day in history and no one would even notice. The focus is on her smile - the most recognizable and talked about smile on the planet.

Smiles guide our fantasies. They connect us. They are the Olympian gateways to our desires. The champions of love.

The "open smile" is probably the most winning human courting stratagem. With lips drawn upward (engaging the zygomatic muscles which run from the cheekbone to the corners of the mouth and the obicularus oculi - which create the delighted crinkle in the outer corner of the eyes), the upper and lower teeth are fully exposed. It is also the least complicated facial expression to execute. Compared to the 96 nuances of anger, which depend on several hundred different muscle combinations, smiling is a breeze.

Like eyes, lips reveal telling cues about our innermost feelings. And because our lips are connected to the visceral nervous system and to the companion muscles that surround our mouth, our lips are the most emotionally expressive part of our body. We actually have difficulty keeping them still. At least, I know, I do.

So, can smiles mislead us? You betcha'. By observing opposite gender couples in casual conversations at bars, social anthropologists have been able to synopsize sexual response to smiling. It turns out that many women will try to radiate warm smiles to encourage men to talk to them - the smile suggests an approachability and openness. Men, on the other hand, may misinterpret the amicable signal and read it as an invitation to racier liaisons. Small wonder.

As to why this particular smile should excite us, well, that gets a little more complex. Apparently the opened-mouth grimace is a natural response when experiencing heightened sexuality. Chimpanzee when they play, expose only their bottom teeth, so as not to threaten one another with their sabre-like upper canine teeth. Humans bare their teeth when feeling cornered or when caught in a competitive situation. This "nervous smile" is an ancient mammalian practice. Predictably, the uptight grin is not likely to lead to a relay of kisses.

And while we may think that smiles are the best way to get our love messages across the finish line, the subliminal vocabulary of our lips can speak volumes. The lip lick is the most common non-verbal pickup cue. Some people indulge only a single, moistening lick, wetting the lower or upper lip, while others slowly glide the tongue over the mouth's entire surface.

As far as neurological feats go, the fact that we can blow and whistle a tune testifies to our lips' fluent adaptability. "You know how to whistle..." coyly purred Lauren Bacall through a well-chiselled set of lips in the 1944 film To Have and Have Not.

Lips also play an important role in sub-verbal language: one "bites" one's lip in vexation; "curls" one's lip in scorn; "hangs" one's lip in humiliation; is "lip deep" when being superficial; has a "stiff upper lip" when being firm; gives "lip" or acts "lippy" with brazen talk; and pays "lip service" when proffering but not performing like a champion.

The Alchemy of Love - 2010

By Julie Enfield on December 29, 2009 1:23 AM

The meeting of two personalities is

like the contact of two chemical substances;

if there is any reaction, both are transformed.

-Carl Gustav Jung (1875-1961)

I am not an alchemist, but I do know a thing or two about the transformative powers of romance. I know that when we fall in love, for example, the world sways in ecstasy at our feet. We kiss all night. We float on air. We grow wings. We soar.

The medieval notion of alchemy (transforming base metals into gold) was used as a metaphor by Swiss psychologist Carl Gustav Jung. He described alchemy as a method of self transformation whereby the alchemist fuses the opposite elements within herself (i.e. conscious / unconscious) and achieves wholeness. Imagine the passion that flowed between Jung and his mistress Toni Wolf, who he believed was not only his psychological amanuensis, but also his spiritual muse, the anima of his animus.

From the lavish Greek culture that raised pleasure to epicurean heights, to the thousands of myths, poems, books, songs, operas and legends that have followed, almost every Zoomer knows what the fiery-flush of infatuation feels like.

Of course, this begs the question: Is there such a thing as too much love? The twentieth-century British poet W.H. Auden compared love to: "an intolerable neural itch." And, anyone who has weathered the all-consuming storm of infatuation will recognize its signs: the heady euphoria; the lingering torment; the sleepless nights awash in a whirlwind of ecstasy - or anguish. We long for our next rendezvous with him or her. When we are together we whisper silly things. We talk all night. We caress. We fight. We make-up. We kiss.

"What of soul was left, I wonder, when the kissing had to stop?" reflected the nineteenth-century poet Robert Browning in A Toccata of Galuppi's.

But does it have to stop?

Not according to a modern-day "alchemist" friend called NIkki, who, in her most timely fashion sent me (via her BlackBerry) a "what's on the relationship docket" for 2010. Most of us have heard the gloom and doom reports of increased divorces. But not from Psychic Nikki who holds that the happiest couples are those that who generate positive emotions in their partnership. She focuses on cultivating a mind/body awareness. Here she shares (in quotations} her relationship trends for the up-coming year.

HELLO, I LOVE YOU

"Men and women over 45 who are craving love and affection will, in 2010, invest more of their time in romantic courtship." I cannot overemphasize the importance of courtship - especially for women. The smile is the most recognizable and communicable gesture in the world. Smiles guide our fantasies. They connect us. The "open smile" is probably the most enticing human courting stratagem.

BABY LOVE

"Women over forty-five will want to have children." Just touching or kissing a baby can cause oxytocin to surge, inspiring some women to want have another baby to nuzzle, thereby restoring her sense of well-being. This urge is understandable - as children grow up, parental cuddling lessens, and many women find themselves suffering from a oxytocin withdrawal.

MY GUY

"2010 will see the expansion of the Cher and Madonna syndrome of older women with younger men." Not every pair of lovers is matched in age. And it's hard to imagine, but some women (and men) are involved with partners who are young enough to be their progeny. This, of course, does not mean that these encounters are fleeting or lacking in depth. We must acknowledge, they can be dangerous, powerful, forbidden - and, perhaps, exactly what we wanted.

HOT STUFF

"Zoomers will take a more creative approach in their sexual outlook in 2010." Well, that's good news...According to psychologists, the happiest lovers engage in three types of sexual activity: sweet, tender kiss-embraces or "comfort sex," sensational lovemaking sessions, and "quickies." Variety is not only the spice of life, it is the main ingredient for a sustained relationship.

CHAPEL OF LOVE

"2010 will see many men in their 50s and 60s and even 70s tying the knot." The payoff of marriage is great: better health, more fun, better sex, more growth, longer life...

MIDNIGHT ON THE OASIS

"I foresee couples taking more hedonistic vacations together". Whether we see it in ourselves or not, we all possess the power to seduce. We are all great Don Juan's and Juanita's at heart. When is the best time to stage a seduction? Partners are generally more relaxed when they are on vacation - when they have some retreat distance from the office.

WHOLE LOTTA LOVE

"I feel that couples in long-term relationships will share a deeper initimacy in 2010. (Even though there will be divorces in La La Land.)" Kissing is a temptation and an invitation at once. Sweeter than ice-wine, a romantic kiss promises special favours. It can inspire passion as well as advance love. It can make the mind sparkle, the body glow. Kissing an exquisite aphrodisiac because it makes you feel so marvellously desired. It's love's magic potion.

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